Wednesday, January 24, 2007

 

A Bush of Words

Hey this is neat: you can go to this section of the New York Times that looks at Bush's past State of the Union Addresses and look at the frequency of certain words appearing, both in a single speech and in separate years. You can choose a word from a scroll-down menu up top. I recommend looking at the word "terror", which interestingly he used only once in the beginning of the year 2001, but umpteen times in speeches after 9/11. Talk about an agenda.

I think they should add words that he was thinking of during his speeches but that he didn't say. Those would include "pooky", "sausage", and "lilly-livered".

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

 

Me in 35 Years



Henry's good-looking, a sharp dresser, and he plays one hell of a shuffleboard game. He even gets to talk about both the art AND science of accountability. Talk about building your own church.

Next installment:
Thicker sarcasm that you can actually spread on toast!

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

 

More S-Ham

Here's the subject of some spam I received just now:

"I had a poker buddy that was returning a movie to Blockbuster when the place got robbed."

Now, given that it should have read, " a poker buddy who was returning a movie", I was able to assume this was spam and avoid the embarassment of yet another stock quote. You see? This way I have freed up some time so I can devote more of my energy to things like proving bench advertising works (which I did at least four times on my way home last night).
Now that's just good capitalist living!

Monday, January 15, 2007

 

Spreadable Ham

I received some spam today and the subject, which was surprisingly coherent for once, read:

"Ironically, Michael Moore eats minorities."

I'm not sure why it's ironic (it's not like spam adheres to proper English). But funny enough, it is ironic because Moore's always going on about the majority. Ha ha!
SPAM: 1, DAVID: 0

(Because otherwise it makes a lot of sense that he would do that. Very King Henry VIII of him, the portly bugger.)

Friday, January 12, 2007

 

awww

This photo was in an email to me from Lomography.com



Thursday, January 04, 2007

 

My Desktop at Work

It occured to me that one way to prevent my identity from being stolen is to share it willingly. So here is the first in a series of identity-sharing exercises.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

 

Happy New Year

This year I will try to be less fat, less hairy, less smelly and I will try to sniffle less. I will endeavour to lose at least one thing a day, and I predict that I will get a visit from Jesus sometime in August. The colour red will start talking to me, and I will become allergic to cackling. My ears will move away from my eyes as a result of an unresolved argument, which is the inverse of what happened last year, so all is well.
Praise be to the roly-poly hog who knows not the quality of his pork.

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